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where are those butterflies?

August 10, 2011

I used to yearn for that feeling….the anticipation of something exciting popping up right around the corner.  Whether it was a travel ice hockey game at 5am the next day that I had to get up for, a family vacation, the first day of college, those knots that build up in my stomach…You know what I am speaking of, its eustress, a natural part of being human, and a healthy part of life.  I, like everybody else that I have ever met, is much better off when keeping busy as much as possible.  The more that is stacked on my plate, the less time I have to dwell on certain things which in turn correlates to 100% concentration.

As I lay awake five days before what arguably begins the most important stage of my life.  25 years old, moving to a new city, starting off on a clean slate…this is big.  Friends and family have asked me if I am feeling anxious and stressed about the big move?  There has been so much anticipation over the past few months, and the time is finally arriving.  Growing up, I always wanted to celebrate Christmas because I wanted to feel that eagerness on christmas eve.  Do we leave cookies for santa claus?  Does Santa Claus exist?  Most importantly, how many presents do I have under the tree…should I go sneak a peak?  What can be better as a kid then christmas morning?  Don’t get me wrong, my parents made sure Hanukah was always a good time, but eight presents spanned over eight days is way too much waiting for a guy like me.  Patience is the name of the game, and I like to think that over the past few years I have become a lot more resilient and have tried to learn from my mistakes as much as possible.  Although sometimes I think my passion for the task at hand has come back to bite me in the ass on certain occasions.

Bloomington has been good to me…a lot more ups than downs, and living there for almost seven years (besides a brief 6 month stint in Baltimore), I will always look back on my time around IU as a time and place to figure out who I am and what my purpose is in this whole game.  Who knows if I will ever figure out my purpose, but I think I am on somewhat of the right track.  My instincts are the best intuition that I can rely on as I head to the Mile high city.  I am going in open minded, with a completely empty book…I am excited to begin filling in those pages next week when the journey begins on August 16th.  Those childhood butterflies are back, and I am smiling ear to ear.

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